- Medical Assistance
- 2 min
The Second Pair of Ears: Supporting Someone at Medical Appointments
Being the person who comes along to an appointment is a valuable role. Here is how to help without taking over.
Most of us have walked out of a doctor's surgery or hospital clinic and remembered, halfway down the corridor, the question we really wanted to ask. Appointments are often short, the setting can feel rushed or intimidating, and when you are in pain or worried it is hard to think clearly. A little preparation beforehand can help you make the most of the time and leave with a clearer understanding of what happens next.
Spend ten minutes thinking about why you are going and what you want to get out of the appointment. It can help to write down:
If there are several issues, put them in order of importance. In a short appointment, it may not be possible to cover everything, so start with what matters most.
Take a list of all the medicines you take, including vitamins, supplements and herbal products, with their doses. Bring any letters, test results or discharge summaries that might be relevant, especially if you are seeing someone new. If you have had an accident or injury, notes about what happened and when can be useful. Glasses or hearing aids, if you use them, help you take everything in.
Not every question will apply, but these are a good starting point:
It is perfectly fine to read your questions from a piece of paper or your phone. Clinicians are used to it, and many appreciate it.
Be honest, even about things that feel embarrassing. Health professionals have heard it all before, and the full picture helps them help you. If you do not understand something, ask for it to be explained again in a different way. Phrases like "Can you tell me what that means in plain terms?" are entirely reasonable.
Taking notes can help, or you can ask whether you may record the conversation on your phone for your own reference. Before you leave, it can be useful to repeat back what you have understood: "So I need to take this twice a day, and come back if it is not better in two weeks?"
A friend or family member can listen, take notes and remember things you might miss, especially if you are anxious or unwell. Let the clinician know at the start who they are and what role you would like them to play.
Read through your notes while the conversation is fresh. If something is still unclear, many surgeries and clinics have a way to send a follow-up question, or your pharmacist may be able to help with medicine queries. Make a note of any follow-up appointments or tests, and keep everything together in one folder or file.
You are an active partner in your own care. Coming prepared does not make you a difficult patient; it helps the person treating you understand what matters to you, and it helps you leave knowing what to do next.
Before your next appointment
Tick these off and you will get more out of a short consultation.
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